Jason: we've talked. Jason: he thinks its no big deal, we'll get thru it 2gether. Jason: i think it's a pretty big fuckin deal Jason: can't even admit obvious stuff Jason: can't even control some stupid half-cocked impulse & thats worse now Jason: u kno, i got other memories that kinda paint that im damaged goods Jason: that ill do my best to destroy some1 who doesnt even deserve it Jason: tried to kill my lil bro Jason: other lil bro. the kid who came after me Jason: bc they erased me. it wasnt even his fault. Jason: but it was a stupid fuckin impulse i got & i followed thru Jason: i dont think its a good idea for me 2 b there
sad bird in snow: Oh. sad bird in snow: yeah sad bird in snow: sorry, that's... I mean, I don't have a good way to say it over text to indicate how much that... that sounds fucking awful to deal with? sad bird in snow: my bad impulses have never been like that but I get the feeling I think
sad bird in snow: Mm. sad bird in snow: Sorry I sad bird in snow: Came off kind of aggressive, I guess sad bird in snow: I've been dealing with a parade of very strong opinions and figured I'd just, I don't know, try and get all of them over with or something
sad bird in snow: I don't know I was just sad bird in snow: wondering, I guess. sad bird in snow: It's all right if you do or also if you don't I was just wondering if I sad bird in snow: I don't even know where I was going with this.
sad bird in snow: Ye gods I wish I could keep my emotions boxed in like I used to sometimes
sad bird in snow: I mean I'm not entirely sure that's why I was asking and yes or maybe would have been fine too but sad bird in snow: well sad bird in snow: thanks, I think. sad bird in snow: I keep tripping facefirst into my own anxiety and it's not doing great things for me.
Jason: you don’t have 2 do any of this. Jason: I can’t believe im saying this Jason: u don’t have 2 waste ur breath on the bs Jason: the politeness w/e Jason: i will never return it
sad bird in snow: 1. I like you independent of any of the rest of this shit sad bird in snow: 2. Every time I don't apologize for existing the ghost of my mother appears over my shoulder to castigate me for my insolence at length and I start panicking
sad bird in snow: Listen if you want to see me be hosed you're going to have to wait a while sad bird in snow: I could drink you under the table any day of the week
sad bird in snow: I can't keep track of all the slang here, no one uses my slang except three people, it's deeply unfair sad bird in snow: You're going to have to provide translations for your rude boy words sad bird in snow: But also I could still kick your ass.
sad bird in snow: See, that's another thing people want me to get used to sad bird in snow: Where I'm from if you don't understand something, gods help you if it's not in a book available to you or if none of the monks knows it sad bird in snow: "Messed up completely and without hope; to be in a hoplessly bad condition or position." sad bird in snow: I don't know if I trust this since the writer spelled "hopelessly" wrong.
Jason: u shld trust them b/c they spelled it wrong Jason: besides, now ur learning & i expended minimal effort. Jason: & thwarted ur attempt 2 be rude Jason: 🤷♂️
Re: day 255
Jason: he thinks its no big deal, we'll get thru it 2gether.
Jason: i think it's a pretty big fuckin deal
Jason: can't even admit obvious stuff
Jason: can't even control some stupid half-cocked impulse & thats worse now
Jason: u kno, i got other memories that kinda paint that im damaged goods
Jason: that ill do my best to destroy some1 who doesnt even deserve it
Jason: tried to kill my lil bro
Jason: other lil bro. the kid who came after me
Jason: bc they erased me. it wasnt even his fault.
Jason: but it was a stupid fuckin impulse i got & i followed thru
Jason: i dont think its a good idea for me 2 b there
Re: day 255
sad bird in snow: yeah
sad bird in snow: sorry, that's... I mean, I don't have a good way to say it over text to indicate how much that... that sounds fucking awful to deal with?
sad bird in snow: my bad impulses have never been like that but I get the feeling I think
Re: day 255
Jason: its fine. im dealing
Jason: but hopefully u get it now.
Re: day 255
sad bird in snow: Sorry I
sad bird in snow: Came off kind of aggressive, I guess
sad bird in snow: I've been dealing with a parade of very strong opinions and figured I'd just, I don't know, try and get all of them over with or something
Re: day 255
FIRESTARTER: just dont ask me 2 b there2
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sad bird in snow: Do you think you want to marry him, someday?
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Re: day 255
sad bird in snow: wondering, I guess.
sad bird in snow: It's all right if you do or also if you don't I was just wondering if I
sad bird in snow: I don't even know where I was going with this.
sad bird in snow: Ye gods I wish I could keep my emotions boxed in like I used to sometimes
Re: day 255
Jason: the answer is no
Re: day 255
sad bird in snow: well
sad bird in snow: thanks, I think.
sad bird in snow: I keep tripping facefirst into my own anxiety and it's not doing great things for me.
sad bird in snow: sorry.
Re: day 255
Jason: I can’t believe im saying this
Jason: u don’t have 2 waste ur breath on the bs
Jason: the politeness w/e
Jason: i will never return it
Re: day 255
sad bird in snow: 2. Every time I don't apologize for existing the ghost of my mother appears over my shoulder to castigate me for my insolence at length and I start panicking
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Re: day 255
[ after a long pause with the typing indicator on, ]
sad bird in snow: actually that just makes me want to be extra-polite to be annoying.
sad bird in snow: sorry!
sad bird in snow: :)
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Jason: I mean
Jason: my feelings r very hurt
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sad bird in snow: What could I possibly do to make it up to you!
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sad bird in snow: I could drink you under the table any day of the week
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Jason: but don't get my tolerance confused with nero
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sad bird in snow: You're going to have to provide translations for your rude boy words
sad bird in snow: But also I could still kick your ass.
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Jason: we've got internet now
Re: day 255
sad bird in snow: Where I'm from if you don't understand something, gods help you if it's not in a book available to you or if none of the monks knows it
sad bird in snow: "Messed up completely and without hope; to be in a hoplessly bad condition or position."
sad bird in snow: I don't know if I trust this since the writer spelled "hopelessly" wrong.
Re: day 255
Jason: besides, now ur learning & i expended minimal effort.
Jason: & thwarted ur attempt 2 be rude
Jason: 🤷♂️
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sad bird in snow: I'll do a better job next time, I promise.
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Jason: or am i special
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