sad bird in snow: I can only co-sign that kind of feeling. sad bird in snow: I just have to hope since I think he deserves all the love in the world, you know?
sad bird in snow: So he was right when he was drunkenly telling me that you were doing the "pushing him away for his own good" thing. sad bird in snow: He knows you're doing it, though, so it's not going to work.
Jason: we've talked. Jason: he thinks its no big deal, we'll get thru it 2gether. Jason: i think it's a pretty big fuckin deal Jason: can't even admit obvious stuff Jason: can't even control some stupid half-cocked impulse & thats worse now Jason: u kno, i got other memories that kinda paint that im damaged goods Jason: that ill do my best to destroy some1 who doesnt even deserve it Jason: tried to kill my lil bro Jason: other lil bro. the kid who came after me Jason: bc they erased me. it wasnt even his fault. Jason: but it was a stupid fuckin impulse i got & i followed thru Jason: i dont think its a good idea for me 2 b there
sad bird in snow: Oh. sad bird in snow: yeah sad bird in snow: sorry, that's... I mean, I don't have a good way to say it over text to indicate how much that... that sounds fucking awful to deal with? sad bird in snow: my bad impulses have never been like that but I get the feeling I think
sad bird in snow: Mm. sad bird in snow: Sorry I sad bird in snow: Came off kind of aggressive, I guess sad bird in snow: I've been dealing with a parade of very strong opinions and figured I'd just, I don't know, try and get all of them over with or something
sad bird in snow: I don't know I was just sad bird in snow: wondering, I guess. sad bird in snow: It's all right if you do or also if you don't I was just wondering if I sad bird in snow: I don't even know where I was going with this.
sad bird in snow: Ye gods I wish I could keep my emotions boxed in like I used to sometimes
sad bird in snow: I mean I'm not entirely sure that's why I was asking and yes or maybe would have been fine too but sad bird in snow: well sad bird in snow: thanks, I think. sad bird in snow: I keep tripping facefirst into my own anxiety and it's not doing great things for me.
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sad bird in snow: And also Cardinal.
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Jason: just needs 2 see the rest
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sad bird in snow: Someday I hope his family gets their shit sorted out.
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Jason: but he's important to nero
Jason: so w/e
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sad bird in snow: I just have to hope since I think he deserves all the love in the world, you know?
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Jason: i know
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sad bird in snow: I don't know if he officially told you you're invited, but you're obviously invited to the wedding.
[ "I fucking dare you to decline, Mr. 'I'm definitely fine'" ]
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Jason: & i don't think it'd be a good idea 4 me 2 go.
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Jason: 2 b perfectly frank
Jason: but mayb if i went i'd act enough mess that he wld get it.
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sad bird in snow: He knows you're doing it, though, so it's not going to work.
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Jason: he thinks its no big deal, we'll get thru it 2gether.
Jason: i think it's a pretty big fuckin deal
Jason: can't even admit obvious stuff
Jason: can't even control some stupid half-cocked impulse & thats worse now
Jason: u kno, i got other memories that kinda paint that im damaged goods
Jason: that ill do my best to destroy some1 who doesnt even deserve it
Jason: tried to kill my lil bro
Jason: other lil bro. the kid who came after me
Jason: bc they erased me. it wasnt even his fault.
Jason: but it was a stupid fuckin impulse i got & i followed thru
Jason: i dont think its a good idea for me 2 b there
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sad bird in snow: yeah
sad bird in snow: sorry, that's... I mean, I don't have a good way to say it over text to indicate how much that... that sounds fucking awful to deal with?
sad bird in snow: my bad impulses have never been like that but I get the feeling I think
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Jason: its fine. im dealing
Jason: but hopefully u get it now.
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sad bird in snow: Sorry I
sad bird in snow: Came off kind of aggressive, I guess
sad bird in snow: I've been dealing with a parade of very strong opinions and figured I'd just, I don't know, try and get all of them over with or something
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FIRESTARTER: just dont ask me 2 b there2
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sad bird in snow: Do you think you want to marry him, someday?
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sad bird in snow: wondering, I guess.
sad bird in snow: It's all right if you do or also if you don't I was just wondering if I
sad bird in snow: I don't even know where I was going with this.
sad bird in snow: Ye gods I wish I could keep my emotions boxed in like I used to sometimes
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Jason: the answer is no
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sad bird in snow: well
sad bird in snow: thanks, I think.
sad bird in snow: I keep tripping facefirst into my own anxiety and it's not doing great things for me.
sad bird in snow: sorry.
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